When You Feel Like You Should Be Further Ahead by Now

I feel like I have been pregnant with this amazing, incredible energy healing revolutionary business for a good five years. And I don't mean that in a cute spiritual, wow, it's so amazing. I'm a vessel of life kind of way. I mean it in like week 38, 39, 40, I imagine 41 of like, please get this baby out of me. This is frustrating. It hurts. and I'm not yet where I thought I'd be. This resonates, this is the episode for you. This is the healer's journey. I am your host, Inge Broer. And what we do here is we find a block on the healer's journey every single week.

And then we dig into it. We find what's really going on. We analyze it. We dessame it. We tell stories about it. And then hopefully we move through it. So this week's block is I should be further along with my business by now. It's a block that shows up in the gap between vision and desire and actual capacity. For me, it's especially painful when like the vision is taking on a life of its own and people want to join in the vision, but I cannot actually make it real yet. And what it does for me is it makes me feel overwhelmed, over stimulated.

It makes me snappy, irritated, and eventually collapse. And if our goal is to steward our business along in a beautiful way, this is kind of counterproductive. Yeah. So, this one's really tricky in some ways because almost always I like to preach start before you're ready. And then once in a while I see someone really start before they're ready. I see them go all in, hire coaches, betting their life savings on this work and it made me feel uncomfortable. Now, part of that is my own blocks because I am comfortable going slow.

I think I'm too comfortable going slow. So, I'm going to own part of my discomfort watching that. But there's another level of discomfort where I'm seeing them go all in on the business side without having the real foundations in place like the real steady strong foundations because there really is a difference between healing skills, business skills, and life skills. And you need all of them to create a thriving business. You need all of them in place to create to make the vision that you have for your business come to life.

So, you definitely need the healing skills because you need to be able to make real whatever promises you're making, why people are giving you money. The healing skills are non-negotiable. You need to know what you're doing. You need to be able to meet people where they're at. You need to be able to read their nervous systems. You need to be able to um guide in a way that is full of integrity. You also need the business skills and the business skills overlap with some healing skills because a lot of the business skills require a lot of refinement and thought, a lot of refinement in who you are.

In other business words, what your brand is. What is it that somebody is going to come to you for? in their healing journey. What makes you the right one for them? And that requires enough healing work for you to actually embody that and be comfortable with that and clearly say no to the wrong people. So you might be somebody like I was in the beginning, somebody like very open and curious and ready to learn and an amazing fit for people who are coming into this world for the first time. And so you want to do a lot of Reiki sessions or a lot of energy healing sessions for people who are new to this world, who are taking their first steps in.

That's amazing. But you might be somebody who doesn't have a lot of friendships, but the ones that you do, you keep for life and you might have that similar templating in your business. And so for you, like you might have year-long containers with people, you take like three clients deep and that's it. For you to be able to own that, you need to have done enough healing work on yourself to own who you are to really be who you are out loud. Be visible for it and be willing to repel all the wrong people.

That means becoming comfortable with a certain rejection, celebrating rejection, being happy that you are rejected by the wrong people for you. That's on the branding level, on the marketing level. You need to have done enough healing work to know what can your clients expect from working with you. And then there's the life skills. If your life is a dumpster fire, you're not going to be able to be available on the long run to create a business, to do the things that a business requires you to do.

You're not going to be able to get it together to have a consistent marketing plan, consistent thought leadership, consistency in seeing clients and getting back to them about when their sessions are. You need all three. You need the healing skills, the business skills, and the life skills. And so when I see people jump all in before they're ready, like part of me really is in awe and like total respect and like raw, you go, you got this. Build it as you're falling down the cliff. But when I see them not having the life skills, business skills, and healing skills, it makes me nervous.

I do know you can really build a parachute on the way down. And I do know you can learn a lot in a very short amount of time if you put yourself in the right condition. The larger point behind all of this is that nobody really talks about how much invisible work goes into this path of energy healing or being a healer. Because the external structures that exist for other therapists like counselors or massage therapists, they don't usually exist for energy healers. There's a lot of education we need to do for our clients.

The marketing is part of the healing. All of that is invisible. All of that is part of the work. On top of that, we're symbolizing a whole paradigm shift. Not only is the actual work that we do with people a whole paradigm shift in itself, but how we do it, how we get people in. Traditional methods don't always work. If you get people in because you're marketing on their pain points, because they feel victimized, who are you going to attract? Well, you're going to attract people who want to be saved.

And who do you want to attract? Not freaking that most of us. Because this is a work of empowering people. So, if you're marketing, you are disempowering them. You're painpoint marketing. You don't attract the people for whom this work is going to be a complete liberation unless you do that with a lot of skill and refinement. So even if you don't really see how much work you're doing to make this into a business, I do and I want you to see it too. When I was in my Raiki Masters um program, it was the one and only time we ever talked about pricing in all of my training, almost all of my training.

And I did a a full certificate, two-year certificate, and our teacher encouraged us to see how much went into us being Raiki masters, how much we had invested. And the general feeling in the group was like, "Oh, but I invested that because I got so much out of that or I invested that because um I couldn't not do that. This is a pleasure for me. This is um this is my liberation. This is my freedom. This is my well-being. And yet anything else you price for how much you've invested in it. I'm selling you a garment.

I need beautiful silk to make it. That's included in the cost. your training you've done right now. Your blood, sweat, and tears, your procrastination, your moments of healing, like that is all part of what you're offering people. All of that exists in your vibration. And all of that is typically invisible. It's alone on your couch deciding to not watch another episode, but meditate instead. It is taking Tik Tok off your phone. It is tweaking an algorithm to give you things that uplift you rather than drag you down and overwhelm you.

It's a quadrillion tiny mini skill many skills. And so when I hear what I heard this week from a few students in my Healer Awaken program that just finished that they're saying like, "Wow, this validated something for me. This is huge for me. This is so important for me. This is something I'm going to be continuing and I'm not ready for the next step. I'm not ready for healer embodied yet. I feel like I need my life to calibrate to this next level. I feel like I need to let this catch up a little bit.

I need to play with this a little bit more. I need to marinate in this part. The part of me that feels like my business isn't far along enough and why isn't streamline. Why aren't people going from healer awakened right into healer embodied like I designed it? No, I feel rooted, content, satisfied that I'm attracting people with so much integrity that care about the same things that I do. So, okay, my business numbers take a sort of hit, but I'm building this on the real long term. And one of the things I've been found I found really confusing over the years is that if you tap into a certain side of the algorithm like I did um on Instagram like every money coach they'll show their me their numbers as soon as it's like at $100,000 US or more.

And so anybody under that just doesn't seem to share their numbers. Um, so it seems like if you're not making that magic number, which somehow like the collective have decided that's the number we need to be aiming for, you feel alone, unseen, like you're probably doing something wrong. But is that true? Is there like a certain magic number that makes you somehow like like you made it like respectable what you're doing? I really don't think so. We all have different situations. For some, this is a supplemental income.

you already have a certain job. You're doing this on the side and having an extra couple of thousand a year makes a huge difference. Allows for um maybe a luxurious retreat every year. Allows for your trainings. It allows for you to keep building slowly so that your retirement plan can include running a healing business. Maybe you're really young and you're still living with your parents and you don't have um a lot of the usual costs. So any money that you're making is just validation that you're on the those are successes.

But somehow a lot of us are in this trance that if it's not a certain number, we don't we don't matter. So for a while and on my worst days, this happens as well. I make it mean when I feel like I'm behind, when I feel like I should be further along in my business by now. And like I've been at this for 15 years. Sure, I took like I made a really big pivot and I took a big break when Hendrickk was born, who had just turned four a week ago. Um, and I own that. But still, it's been 15 years that I'm at this.

There could be a part of me that says like, "Okay, well clearly I am not like other people because I've been doing this this long. I should be making more right now or I should be helping more people or I should whatever whatever the thing is." actually all leading into it or I should be more consistent in my social media posting or I should be more refined in my thought leadership or I should have more frameworks or I should be published in some magazines or I should be featured etc etc and when I get caught in those thoughts I might think like I'm stupid I'm not like other people the people who are successful for sure are lying um if my work was actually really good wouldn't this be happening faster faster and at the worst time when I really want to collapse, it does happen very infrequently because I know to my core I am made for this.

But there's a part of me that says maybe I'm not cut out for this. And the thing is like I have been inconsistent. I have prioritized life over business often. I've ghosted things that didn't light me up. I've gotten people on board way before I was ready. I've sat on ideas for years before launching them. I've had programs that I made before I was ready and then I like it felt like I had to contort myself and distort myself to sell it. I just wasn't in the right energy and then I I retired that program and then I sort of tried again without realizing it two years later.

Things like this, things that are built from our very soul and our life force and our life experience and all that tweaking of developing more healing skills, more business skills, our more life skills to support all of that. All of that takes time. So when we are caught up in this my business should be f further along right now, what are we comparing ourselves to? like whose timeline are we on? Because if I'm really really honest, what I'm after, even if it's been 15 years, what I'm really after is building like something with depth and integrity, something that leaves a legacy, like a framework that stands the test of time, isn't just some kind of a trend.

I'm not trying to make a quick What I'm trying to do is create a lifestyle that is sustainable, fulfilling, satisfying. My kids are tiny right now. I don't want to be running from place to place trying to like write content while they're grabbing my attention. And don't get me wrong, like I have done that. I know how yucky that feels. I'm not some perfect mom who's like super ultra mega present for them every second of their lives. I get irritated as well. But my business flow allows for a lot of flexibility.

And the other thing is like, okay, when I post a real that has about 200 views, which is on the lower end for me right now. Yeah. Part of me can get sucked into the algorithms that the social media like you've got to I don't know like you got to go viral to be successful. 200 views on a roll real is like 200 people that have watched this without going on a stage to talk to 200 people. Even if it's worth like 10 10 seconds, still 200 people seeing it. Like that's incredible. One client is one client that you got to spend some time with and you got to change the trajectory of their lives forever.

One discovery call is one discovery call that you got to open something for them. So what I want to end this with are two things. Okay? One is maybe there are some skills that you need to tweak. Maybe there are some things you have to get going. And maybe you have to see how much you've done. And I want to end with this like sense of like, okay, come on. We're get in the car. We're going we're not going fast or we're not screaming. We're going in the car to get you back to yourself to remember why you're doing this in the first place.

Go slow to go far. We're going to get you calibrated back to your rhythm. And your rhythm is not avoidance. So if you are in avoidance because you feel like you should be further right now, that is the reason you're not further. You have to keep taking action. Whether that is in the lifestyle things, things like getting your meal planning figured out, that is a huge business asset. It removes so much cognitive load that you need for this work. This work is deep as hell. It can make you wander around and like not see anything because you're tracking something deep inside that is going to change and shift timelines and be an incredible paradigm shift for the people who need you.

Maybe it's a business skill. Maybe you do need to learn how to craft a hook. I do. I've resisted it. I'm trying to find hooks that are that make people feel good and positive. I don't know. And maybe it is a healing skill. Maybe you simply don't have enough practice yet. You don't know who you are as a healer. You don't know what kind of transformation you can hold. You don't know what kind of containers. Make sense? You got to get going. And if you need a container for that, that's what healer embodied is.

It's a six months together. We explore all of that and by the end you know who you are as a healer. You can talk about it because the deeper work has been done. So together let's get back into like remembering why we're doing what we're doing. Feeling the amazingness that we get to be part of an incredible paradigm shift happen. It's insane how cool that is. honor the fact that our the way we're running our businesses itself is a paradigm shift. The pathways aren't very clear. When we try to go on somebody else's timeline or someone else's pathway, it doesn't work because it's not coming from you.

So this is requires you to be internally anchored. And so draw back into your body. Drop back into what you know is real. Tune into your self- responsibility and also in all the grace that you're doing exactly what you need to be doing. This has been the healer's journey. I'm your host, Inge. If you want to take this a little further, I invite you to DM me on Instagram @ iing n g e h e a lsinga heels.